#Romney #refuses to eat #Obama's #dog #food. Why not?

Bo, Obama's dog, issued statement saying he is willing to share his food, shoes, toys and tomatoes with Romney

     Politico.com August 12, 2011: At the Republican presidential debate in Iowa on Thursday night, in response to a question about the debt deal, Mitt Romney quipped,”Look, I'm not going to eat Barack Obama's dog food, all right?”   

           According to Bo's official White House baseball card, Bo, almost three years old and a Portuguese water dog, also enjoys eating tomatoes, shoes and toys.  No, the White House chefs do NOT cook for the First Dog.                                                                                           

            The blog Obama Foodorama revealed that Bo eats "like any other dog in America" and consumes “store-bought dog food" but wouldn't comment on kibbles or canned.                                                                                                                          Was Romney boldly refusing to eat tomatoes?  Or shoes?  Or toys?  Mr. Romney should be told that Bo’s food may be more nutritious than the food denied the poor when they lose their federal assistance and food stamps. 

“I don't eat anything that a dog won't eat. Like sushi. Ever see a dog eat sushi? He just sniffs it and says, "I don't think so." And this is an animal that licks between its legs and sniffs fire hydrants.”   Billiam Coronel

#Spector's #Talking #Dog #Story

Just touch me and I'll never, ever kvetch

        From #Dave #Spector, program host, stand-up comic and hilarious guy who lives in Japan:   (For anyone not Yiddish conversant, to “kvetch” means to complain, a lot.)

        Morty visits Dr. Saul, the veterinarian, and says, "My dog has a problem."

            Dr. Saul says, "So, tell me about the dog and the problem.

           "It's a Jewish dog. His name is Seth and he can talk," says Morty.

            "He can talk?" the doubting doctor asks.

            "Watch this!" Morty points to the dog and commands: " Seth, Fetch!"

            Seth the dog, begins to walk toward the door, then turns around and says, "So why are you talking to me like that? You always order me around like I'm nothing. And you only call me when you want something. And then you make me sleep on the floor, with my arthritis. You give me this fahkahkta food with all the salt and fat, and you tell me it's a special diet. It tastes like dreck! YOU should eat it yourself! And do you ever take me for a decent walk? NO, it's out of the house, a short piss, and right back home. Maybe if I could stretch out a little, the sciatica wouldn't kill me so much! I should roll over and play dead for real for all you care!"

            Dr. Saul is amazed, "This is remarkable! So, what's the problem?"

     Morty says, "He has a hearing problem! I said 'Fetch,' not 'Kvetch."

“Sometimes you panic and find yourself emitting remarks so profoundly inane that you would be embarrassed to say them to your dog. Your dog would look at you and think to itself, "I may lick myself in public, but I'd never say anything as stupid as that." . – Dave Barry   

#Lloyd with the better #dog #poop story

When it comes to this stuff, I just do the best I can. 

     Comment on Cable in the closet. What to do about a #dog who forgets #housebreaking?

Lloyd said...

        My dog pooped one night in the shower. How cool was that! Picked up the poop, turned on the shower and it was all cleaned up.

         My answer: interesting how dogs can pick out the best places for a mistake: Gizmo chose the closet with tile floor. No shower water there, alas.

"If you can't decide between a Shepherd, a Setter or a Poodle, get them all ... adopt a mutt!" – ASPCA

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“Our dog died from licking our wedding picture.” Phyllis Diller

Does this mean #Gizmo is #housebroken again?

Ah, to be in their good graces again!

       Gizmo is in his cage at home, while we drive to Santa Fe to hear a lecture about the steamy letters between Georgia O’Keeffe and art-promoter/photographer Alfred Stieglitz.  When we get back, Gizmo is excited and the still-locked cage is six feet from the wall where it started, but there is no cable in the bedroom closet, the pillows are where we left them on the bed and there are no more scratches on the inner garage door.

       I let him out in the back yard garden area, he runs with great energy and then runs back into the house to greet us again and drink water.  No tranquilizers given, problem perhaps solved.

“Some dog I got.   We call him Egypt. Because in every room he leaves a pyramid.”  Rodney Dangerfield

#Gizmo, #interior #decorator

Before Gizmo re-decorated  

After Gizmo's delicate touches

      When we are gone, if he has the run of the house, Gizmo rearranges pillows on bed.  See the before and after pictures.

    “A pekingese is not a pet dog; he is an undersized lion.”  A.A. Milne

Cable in the closet. What to do about a #dog who forgets #housebreaking?

Oops.  Should I be sorry?

      We get home, it is thundering, lightning strikes every few seconds, starting to rain and Gizmo is in panic.  He has “laid cable” in our closet again.

     What to do?  Grace wants to go to a vet and get him some puppy tranquilizers.

      I say longer walks and put him into a cage when we go away.  It is a standoff, although I walk him for an hour (about 3 miles) the next day.   We will see what happens.

    “It's tough to stay married. My wife kisses the dog on the lips, yet she won't drink from my glass.” Rodney Dangerfield