Fake Balls for Real Dogs

Two males, zero fake balls

     New York Times business section, June 5, 2011: Upscale (and a bit goofy) dog owners can now serve their doggie “friends” pan-seared duck with brown rice and blueberry compote, roasted turkey with butternut squash and russet potatoes and salmon with black-and-white quinoa.  It’s part of a trend.                                                                                              Last  year, according to this NY Times story, Americans spent a record $55 billion on their pets, more than the gross domestic product of Belarus.

“Jenn Mohr has designed a candle to address the doggie flatulence.   Made with floral ylang-ylang, white tea, myrtle and fennel, the “Fart & Away” candle sells for $28.”  Sounds useful for many humans.                                                                                                                                   The story also noted, “If more evidence of this boom were needed, consider Neuticles, prosthetic testicles for neutered dogs and cats, at about $1,000 a pair, which, their designers say, help “your pet to retain his natural look, self esteem and aids in the trauma associated with altering.””                                                                                                                                        Now just wait a minute: buying a false set of balls for your dog for $1,000 dollars to help his self esteem?  What about your self esteem after you have done something like that?   My guess is that you might need some false balls yourself!                                                                    Is it any wonder the Taliban want to destroy us?  Is this a possible sure sign of the end times for America?

“I wonder what goes through his mind when he sees us peeing in his water bowl.”  ~Penny Ward Moser