Question: Are we Gizmo’s "owners"?

Because he can.

One columnist had a small snit about that: “There is a movement to call those of us who keep a pet its “guardian,” “companion,” “steward,” or “caretaker” rather than “owner.”  My understanding is that the objection to ownership relates to a master-slave relationship. The implication is that one cannot “own” a pet without making it a slave. Balderdash!”

Well, when pet columnists use words like “balderdash,” one understands that this is an emotionally charged issue.

I might be adding even more heat to the fire when I ask: Am I Gizmo’s “daddy” and is Grace his “mommy”?

We know people who refer to themselves as their dog’s mom or dad and, I have to admit, sometimes late at night when a bit of tired teasing is almost acceptable, I will refer to Grace as his “Mommy.”  It is always a dangerous expression.

If we are, in any way, Gizmo’s mom and dad, are our children his brothers and sisters?  Half-brothers?  Step-sisters? 

How do we break it to them that they have a furry 30-pound brother that likes to lick his own remaining testicles?   Will they be jealous of both the love we have for him and the licking testicles thing?  Will this lead to family strife or, worse, extremely odd behavior at the Thanksgiving dinner table?

Some days you're the dog; some days you're the hydrant. Unknown